when did i start disliking most people? by Scott Ferry

maybe it was when i stopped drinking
 
(i don’t even like myself anymore)
but i convince myself to love everyone
 
below the bells and the drool
below the clatter and the hunger
 
because i know we connect there in a pool—
where our sad nerves ribbon into the water
 
three floors up our hair-styled heads still compete
on who controls the doors
 
in a side bathroom our sex still puppets
with a pair of wooden hands
 
our credit and titles still drape
like neon moss from the willows  
 
not any use down here where our limbs
denature and spool into the milk
 
i can love you here and only
here i promise to even forgive for not forgiving
 
i do care but only if the skin sloughs off only
if our names string ghosts on vowels
 
and your jellied chestpump swims
past my aorta like a saffron axolotl only
 
if we word without wording only
if i can trust who we have now become

Scott Ferry helps our Veterans heal as a RN. He has recent work in the American Journal of Poetry, Misfit, and Spillway. His second book, Mr. Rogers kills fruit flies, is available from Main St. Rag. You can find more of his work @ ferrypoetry.com.