In Search of Something By Skaja Evens

I rejoined a dating app last night

Considering my current options, none seem viable

Or willing

To share affection with me

Everyone’s busy with other people, other things

I’ll continue to swipe left on most potential suitors

As I slowly wither away, devoid of the sunshine and water that would have me flourish

As I’m in my Too Muchness, too brilliant for anyone not wearing shades

I saw a memory last night

A photo of me, recharged and blissful

Smiling and momentarily happy

Only a year ago, but feels like ten lifetimes

I told some friends when the marriage ended

That was probably the end of my sex life

I’ve been mostly right when I look at the lineup of mistakes

And the occasional excellent choice with bad timing

Now I know what you’ll say

How I’m manifesting that into being, with my negative vibes or some bullshit

However, when someone like me, with particular proclivities, 

Finds herself alone

Filling that void isn’t as simple as saying yes to the next invitation

Skaja Evens is a writer, publisher, and artist living in Southeast Virginia. She edits It Takes All Kinds Literary Zine and Disturb The Universe Magazine, both published by Mōtus Audāx Press. She’s been published in Spillwords Press, The Rye Whiskey Review, Medusa's Kitchen, Synchronized Chaos, Blue Pepper, Ink Pantry, Off The Coast, Black Shamrock, and The Crossroads Lit Magazine, among others. She often listens to music, considers the impossible, and enjoys her cats’ antics.