I hear a Symphony By Jason Baldinger

Wednesday night
is not a good night
for cocaine

but with the house
stripped near bare
since she’s been gone
how could I fail
not to find
the teener
lost in the nightstand

a bump
another bump
calling friends
rambling light speed
they hang up
who the fuck cares
if they don’t want to party

it’s late before
the need to scare up more
maybe the sun was up
maybe it wasn’t

the curtains pulled
black out in the bomb shelter
except for little streams
of light, picking cat litter
out of the carpet
teeth vibrating

wait, do I even have a cat?

I’ve been doing shots
to bring me down
a quarter bottle
wild turkey, a mostly
full bottle of peppermint schnapps
she left in the liquor cabinet
disappear

I think it’s ten am
I think everyone’s at work
no one answers their phones
anymore anyway

I leave messages
voices hidden in electronics
me playing electric piano
in my underwear
phone close to the keyboard

fingers numb
play fat chords
wrong, strangle
the truth
I keep shouting
the words
over and over
The Supremes
I Hear a Symphony

Jason Baldinger is a poet hailing from Pittsburgh and recently finished a stint as writer in residence at the Osage Arts Community. He’s the author of several books, the most recent are This Useless Beauty (Alien Buddha Press), The Ugly Side of the Lake (Night Ballet Press) written with John Dorsey and the chaplet Fumbles Revelations (Grackle and Crow) which are available now. The collection Fragments of a Rainy Season (Six Gallery Press) and the split book with James Benger Little Fires Hiding (Spartan Press) are forthcoming. Recent publications include the Low Ghost Anthology Unconditional Surrender, The Dope Fiend Daily, Outlaw Poetry, Uppagus, Lilliput Review, Rusty Truck, Dirtbag Review, In Between Hangovers, Your One Phone Call, Winedrunk Sidewalk, Anti-Heroin Chic, Nerve Cowboy Concrete Meat Press, Zombie Logic Press, Ramingo’s Porch, Blue Mountain Review, Red Fez, Blue Hour Review and Heartland! Poetry of Love, Solidarity and Resistance. You can hear Jason read poems on recent and forthcoming releases by Theremonster and Sub Pop Recording artist The Gotobeds as well as at jasonbaldinger.bandcamp.com