He'll gnaw your knees and elbows raw after biting the legs off all your favorite coffee tables.
If you happen to hear his horny roar approaching, lock up your liquor cabinet and swallow the key before he has the chance to drain your unsuspecting wet bar dry.
He can be decent company.
He is guaranteed to kick-start any dull party.
“Cheers, Here's to swill with time to kill!”
Supply him with ale and let him regale you with a whale of a tale before the Sirens call him home again.
“Bucking waves through all of eternity can really make you thirsty!”
One day as he was bleating about the pressures of being a myth, Poseidon decided to gift him with a 5th
to shut him up as the Mermaids had been complaining.
“It was either that, Poseidon thought, or I would have had to tan his hide and turn him back into little
pieces of parchment.”
The old goat knew it would soon be time to go ashore and so he trimmed his beard and filed his horns.
After applying as much “Axe” as he could stand, He set about on his master plan.
“I must find a nice little cove where they won't be annoyed if I really get ripped,” he quipped.
'I'm no sheep and I can never sleep until I am quite sufficiently tipped.”
Kevin M. Hibshman has had poems published in many journals and magazines world wide.
In addition, he has edited his poetry zine, Fearless, since 1990 and is the author of sixteen chapbooks including Love Sex Death Dreams (Green Bean Press, 2000) and Incessant Shining (Alternating Current, 2011).
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I almost married that guy.
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