Reverse psychology Karma by Scott Simmons

Last night I wore my tin foil hat and stuck my bare ass in the sky.
I said, “Oh fearsome aliens please don’t probe me!”

Unfortunately no aliens came to me or came on me.

I tried to work this angle again by telling a woman why she shouldn’t sleep with me.
And for some reason she still didn’t sleep with me.

Apparently telling someone that you have the clap isn’t a very good pick up line.

Finally I looked in the mirror and told myself “I bet you can’t get laid today”.
So you can damn well guess what I didn’t get to do that day.

Scott Simmons is an aspiring poet and humorist from Texas who is also the editor of The Dope Fiend Daily. He is quite possibly insane and some of his works can be seen on Duane's Poetree and Horror Sleaze trash. His"artwork" can also be found at https://www.instagram.com/deranged_texan/.